Day 9

1. The fines
A man was telling to another one:
"I parked my car near a restaurant. I just wanted to go to the bathroom. I didn't stay more than 4 minutes. When I came out I noticed a policeman writing a fine. I went to him and asked:
-Please don't do it!
But he did't even look at me. Then I said:
-C'mon, you son of a b***h. Stop, please.
This time he looked at me and started to write another fine for old tires. I said:
- Ahh, please. Stop this shit. What did I do?
He looked at me again and started to write a third fine. All this thing took 20 minutes 'til I decided to stop and go home. So I walked by the corner, I entered in my car and drived away."


2. Kenan, the Turkish
In Glasgow there was a great factory. Kenan was an Turkish man that worked in this factory. One day the director of the factorycalled Kenan to him.
-Look, Kenan, I must fire you.
-Alas, But why do you fire me?
-You see, with all this European balderdash .... You didn't do the highschool, that's it!
-No problem. I can do it in one month.
A month later, after Kenan did the highschool the director call him:
-You don't have suprior knowledge, so I must fire you!
-No problem, I'll go to Oxford!
After Kenan comes from Oxford, the director calls him again:
-I did the highschool, the university. What reason do you have to fire me now?
-I don't like other nationality people in my factory.
-No problem, we can go to the Mayor and make me english.
They went to the Mayor and the church and name him Jhon. The director calls him again:
-Look, Jhon, yesterday an EU representant called me and told me that I fire too many people of a different ethnicity, so I must fire some english people too.


3. At the Nile
Three blondes comes to the Nile and wanted to go to the other bank, but the river was inhabited by crocodiles. Each prayed to God to grant them a wish. God agreed. The first blonde said:
- I want a raft.
She got a raft but the crocodiles destroyed the raft and killed her. The second blonde said:
-I want a motorboat.
She got a motorboat but the crocodiles destroyed the motorboat and killed her. The third blonde said:
-I want to be brunette.
She became brunette and looked around.
-Hey look, there's a small bridge!


4. Car names
Did you ever wonder what the car names really mean? Here are some of  'em:

AUDI : Another Ugly Deutsche Invention
BMW : Brings Me Women
FIAT : Failure in Italian Automobile Technology
FORD : Fix Or Repair Daily
HYUNDAI : Hope You Understand, Nothing’s Driveable And Inexpensive
VOLVO : Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
PORSCHE : Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything