Day 27

1. Cartwheel

A blonde who is wearing a dress is walking home from school. She comes across a boy sitting up in a tree.
The boy says to do a cartwheel and the girl says no. Then the boy says:

-I'll give you a cookie.
So the blonde does a cartwheel. When she gets home, her mom asks where she got the cookie from.
The blonde tells her mother about the boy in the tree and the cartwheel.
The mother twills her daughter not to do that anymore.

-The boy is just trying to see her underwear.
The next day the blonde is wearing a dress again and the boy asks her to do a cartwheel again.
The blonde says no and the boy says:

-I'll give you a cookie. So the blonde does the cartwheel again.
When the blonde gets home, the mom says:

-Did you do a cartwheel again?
The blonde says:

-Yes.
The mom says:

-Honey I told you not to do that, the boy is just trying to see your underwear.
Then the blonde says:

-But mom I tricked him, today I didn't wear any underwear!

 2. Hazards

Three women are about to be executed by the armed soldiers.  One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde.  Two guards brings the brunette forward,the soldiers point the guns at her and the executioner asks if she has any last  requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts:

-Ready . . . Onee . . .Twoo....
Suddenly the brunette yells:

-Earthquake!!
Everyone is startled and looks around. So she manages to escape.
The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts:

-Ready . . . Onee . . .Twoo....
The redhead then screams:

-Tornado!!
Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.
By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts:

-Ready . . . Onee . . .Twoo....
The blonde shouts:

-FIRE!!

3. I will jump off

There was a Chinese, Mexican and blonde guy sitting on the top of a 20 story  building that they were fixing and they open their lunch boxes.
The Chinese guy said:

-Orange-chicken again, if I get this one more time I am  going to jump off.
Then the Mexican says:

-Burritos again, if I get this one more time I am going  to jump off"
Hearing that the blonde guy says:

-Ham sandwich again if I get this one more  time I will jump off
So they all got the same thing the next day and they jump off the building. Later at the funeral the Chinese guy's wife says:

-Why didn't he tell me he didn't  want orange-chicken?
Then the Mexican guy's wife says:

-Why didn't he tell me he didn't want burritos?
Then they both look over at the blonde guy's wife and she says:

-Don't look at me like that, he alwaysmade his own lunch!

4. Smart blonde

A blonde walks into a bank in Toronto and asks for the loan department.  She says she's going to Europe on business for three weeks and needs to borrow $10,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan,  so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce. The car is parked on  the street in front of the bank, she has the papers and everything checks out.
The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank manager  and his staff all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $100,000 Rolls as collateral against a $10,000 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive  the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Three weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $10,000 and the interest,  which comes to $141.66. The bank manager says:

-Miss, we are very happy to have  had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a  multi-millionaire. Why would you bother to borrow $10,000?
The blonde replies:

-Where else in Toronto can I park my car for three weeks for only $141.66 and expect it to be there when I return?